On this day of Love, I’d like to remember about my first love, my mother Corazon. Her name means heart in Spanish and I think she was aptly name because as a wife and a mother, she was the light and the Heart of our family.
My mother
was the third daughter in eight siblings. She was born in Cotabato, studied and
got married in Davao. She met my dad at UM when she was studying Chemical
Engineering, my dad was a student of Mechanical Engineering. They eloped and
started a family in Masara, Davao Del Norte where my father was living at the
time. My mother worked in the Laboratory in the mining company while my dad was
with the Human Resources department. My mother gave birth to two boys, my
brothers Edwin and Aldrin and me. We moved to Davao when I was five because
they got a house there and the good schools were there for my brother who was
in college.
My mother
was strict as most parents in the 80s were, she wants me to follow my routines,
sleep early, eat well, get home before sunset. I only recall a few times when she hit me when
I was being naughty. I remember that she loves me and my family so much. She stopped
working to look after us. She wakes up early, prepare my bath, my breakfast and
get me to school, she was at my school in the parents lounge area from kinder
to grade 5. I have a service pool going to school and then she will commute and
get to school and bring my lunch. If I don’t like to eat she spoon feed me. She
reserves the swing for me in the playground. She would “talk” to the kids who
are mean to me. She changes my clothes every lunch time at school, put baby powder
because I will get sweaty after playing. She does this every day and didn’t complain.
I was aware of her and my dad’s sacrifices, how they worked hard for us so I tried
to be a good daughter, tried my best at school and I finished my bachelor’s
degree. I know I had made them proud as they would like to tell their friends
of my achievements.
When I had
my first job at Laguna, I was there by myself and got sick after a few months
of Dengue fever and she was there the next day I was admitted at the hospital. It
was her first time to fly by herself, she brought me Jollibee. She helped me
feel better and stayed with me for a few months. I only stayed with that job
for a few years because I miss my family especially my mom so much. I am a
mamas girl. I learned independence but still want to be with my mom. she still
prepares my bath and my breakfast and baon every day until the day I moved from
home and got married.
When I had Kulay,
my mother was the first person to see him. We stayed at my parents house and my
mom helped me look after my son.
When we
lost my Kuya Edwin and Kuya Aldrin, my mother was never the same. I could only
imagine the pain she had burying her two sons just a few years apart. She started
to be forgetful, not officially diagnosed but she started to have dementia.
One of my
best memories with my mom was when we would go to Merco, just the two of us and
eat our favourite halo-halo. She had simple joys, she don’t go out much, lost
touch with friends, she’s always there for us. She rarely get sick, I only remember
one time I was young when she had hyperacidity and spent some days at the hospital.
She was always healthy and dependable not just for us but for our relatives.
I tried my
best looking after her and my dad when they were older and I hope it was enough.
I hope that my mom felt the love I had for her. I hope she knows that all her
sacrifices, her care and love for me were not in vain.
I had
braced myself for the day I will lose my mom but when the day came, it is
painful. I prayed I can go home to Davao
and spend more time with them but she has passed. We will never be together
again in this world. I pray someday we would be whole as a family again. I hope
she is happy now with my brothers and family who has passed. I pray for her
peace. I pray my father and I will get through this.
I love you
mama, my mama Corazon, a big piece of my heart belongs to you.
